If you’ve ever read an in-depth article or watched a good video about replacing a leaky faucet or repairing an outdated piece of equipment, you know they give a ton of information. Many of them provide step-by-step instructions and a list of necessary tools to get the job done successfully. Well, when it comes to making improvements to our dating lives, it’s almost the same concept, except the repairs must begin with our thoughts. The dating arena can be challenging to navigate, and some of us have shifted to a very pessimistic mindset. If this describes your current line of thinking, it may be because you’ve met people that seem nice in the beginning, but don’t turn out to be who you thought they were—far from it. It can get a little old and bring us down. This is when we need to go to God’s Word for some necessary repairs. In His Word, God provides step-by-step instructions and a list of necessary tools. They will refuel our hopes, rekindle our excitement about the future, and get us back on track to fulfilling our dreams.

God provides His Word as our information headquarters for right living. He’s given us the example of Jesus Christ to follow, and the gift of Holy Spirit as a teacher and guide. Believers can sometimes allow their minds to be dismissive when it comes to familiar scriptures and wisdom. We don’t mediate and study daily as we should, and when this happens, the nourishment meant for our hearts and minds slips away from us. Old thought patterns settle in, and things like believing that men can’t be trusted or that all men are cheaters become blockers to our blessing. To remove outdated thoughts that block our faith and keep us from the blessing we seek, here are a few steps to shift gears to a mindset that pleases Heavenly Father:

Step 1:  Take God at His Word.
In Proverbs 18:22(NKJV), God tells us, “He who finds a wife finds a good thing, And obtains favor from the LORD.” We serve a God that is exact and precise. His Word is timeless and will forever stand as our foundation for right living, abundance, and truth. He considered the challenges of dating in modern times when He expressed this wisdom in Proverbs 18:22 thousands of years ago; for He knows the end at the very beginning. It is monumentally important that the Christian woman takes God at His Word, and that she be confident that He is not slack in any way concerning it. He has made sure there are men in every generation who #1 honor the Godly qualities of a wife, and #2 desire favor from the Lord. So if there’s anything in our minds and hearts that prevents right thinking on God’s provision in this area, we must change it.

Step 2: Keep the Word in your mind.
Hebrews 2:1(NLT) says, “So we must listen very carefully to the truth we have heard, or we may drift away from it.” Remember, it’s our responsibility to keep God’s Word active in our hearts and minds. The Word of instruction in Joshua 1:8(NLT) still applies to believers today. This verse tells us, “Study this Book of Instruction continually. Meditate on it day and night so you will be sure to obey everything written in it. Only then will you prosper and succeed in all you do.” God wants us to succeed. He wants us to be married and partnered up more than we desire it for ourselves. Keeping His Word is paramount to our success.

It is very easy to make poor choices and bad decisions in the area of dating. We get burned this way and lose precious time and resources on this journey. We desperately need to keep the wisdom of God’s Word in our minds, so that we remain on destiny’s path. Then, we can do as 2Corinthians 10:5(KJV) instructs and cast down vain imaginations and arguments from others and even those that exist in our own heads. These are thoughts that place themselves higher than the knowledge of God, and we can never afford to let them dwell in our minds. Instead, we are to capture these thoughts, examine them, and if they don’t line up with the mind of Christ, we need to squash them immediately. We must disconnect from the thoughts that support wrong beliefs. We can’t let them get into our hearts or cancel our commitment to keep God’s Word active in our minds.

Step 3: Survive the test.
It is critical that we understand the increase that marriage yields. It expands our territory exponentially, and to whom much is given, much is required. So many single believers complain about the wait. They don’t understand that God is building capacity within them. Marriage in modern times requires a strong spiritual foundation where the Lordship of Jesus Christ is firmly and unquestionably in place. It cannot be lost on us that the enemy doesn’t want our foundations to be strong in Christ and uses all manner of distractions to keep us from growing in the areas that we need.

Whenever you seek to go higher in Christ, you will always face challenges to keep you down. I encourage you to cease from complaining about the wait, for God is able to make up for any lost time. Survive and surpass the test the enemy is waging against your faith. Open your eyes and be attentive to the confessions you make, the conversations you have, the thoughts you think, and the attitudes that permeate your days. Bring everything under the submission and guidance of the Holy Spirit, as you stay in God’s Word. Know that when you take your obedience and stand to the next level and remove the blockers from your life, you’ll witness a repositioning that brings you in line with the blessing of marriage.■

Scripture quotations marked (NLT) are taken from the Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Wheaton, Illinois 60189. All rights reserved.

“Removing Outdated Thoughts that Block the Blessing of Marriage”, written by Kim Times, edited by Reverend Fran Mack for Sundie Morning Sistas ©2019.  All rights reserved. All done to the glory of God through Jesus Christ, our Lord! SMS is dedicated to inspiring and encouraging Christian Women through the Word of God.