Patricia decided to celebrate Christmas by throwing an intimate gathering of all her single friends a couple of weeks before the holiday. She called it a “‘SIGN’ Soiree”, where all of them would enjoy light-hearted games with good food, and at the end, talk about the contract they would all be asked to sign. The Signal In God’s Newness (SIGN) contract had two simple questions, along with a date and signature line. The first question is “What is my greatest quality?” The second question, “What area of my life do I need to improve the most?” Each person was asked to answer the two questions as briefly as possible, but not sign the contract. They’d then fold it and place it in a bowl. Answering these two questions are very important for any person, particularly if marriage is a goal, but they’d take on a greater significance at Patricia’s SIGN’ Soiree, and here’s why.

1John 3:2(NLT) tells us, “Dear friends, we are already God’s children, but he has not yet shown us what we will be like when Christ appears. But we do know that we will be like him, for we will see him as he really is.” It is a fool-hardy notion to believe that we will always be the exact person we are today. At the soul level, our personality will not change, but we cannot carry the extra-baggage that comes with leaning too much on the world. That stuff has to go. In Romans 12:1-2, we learn that we are to present ourselves before God as a living sacrifice that is holy and acceptable; because this is the very least that we can do for all that Heavenly Father has done for us. He then tells us not to be conformed to this world. This means that we are not to allow the core of our souls to be manipulated by the customs, culture, traditions, behaviors, social norms, and negative beliefs of the world. Instead, God commands that we renew our minds, that we change the way we think, so that our thoughts march right alongside with thoughts of Christ.

Our lives show us what we’re ready for. They reveal the blessings we’re able to handle, because the blessings we are able to handle are the blessings we have this very moment. Whewww! That’s fire!!! Not too many can deal with this kind of heat. It reveals the reality that many sisters want the blessing of marriage but are not prepared for it because they have refused to deal honestly with certain aspects of their lives. As Jesus Christ was preparing the disciples for the road ahead without him, he told them in John 16:12 (NLT), “There is so much more I want to tell you, but you can’t bear it now.” There was much more knowledge the disciples could have known, but Jesus couldn’t tell them this knowledge because they didn’t have the spiritual maturity, strength, and faith to handle what he wanted to impart.

Blessings require spiritual maturity, strength, and faith. Jesus Christ conveyed this to us in Luke 12:48, where he said the person to whom much is given, much will be required. This indicates that a balance must exist. The love of God in our hearts must expand to build a foundation upon which blessings rest. This is particularly true in the blessing of marriage.

Proverbs 4:7(NKJV) says, “Wisdom is the principal thing; therefore get wisdom: and with all thy getting get understanding.” God tells us that wisdom is principal. It’s way up there on the list. Knowledge is information, but just having knowledge does not mean that a person has an understanding of how to apply it. There’s a whole bunch of us with a lot of knowledge in our heads. We’re bursting at the seams with it, but the application of the knowledge we possess eludes us. One of the reasons it does is because we lack understanding. It’s not enough to know the Word, we must understand how to apply it. So, a single woman can have knowledge about being married and still not be wise with regard to being a wife. The wisdom she needs must come from Christ.

Jesus Christ wants to impart to you the wisdom that will bridge the gap between you and your desire to marry. He wants to give you the very Word that will make all the difference in your life. We must understand that the thing that causes delay and separation in our fellowship with God through Christ is the very same thing that causes delay and separation from a future partner. James 1:5-6(NLT) tells us how to put the pieces of the puzzle together. It says, “If you need wisdom, ask our generous God, and he will give it to you. He will not rebuke you for asking. 6 But when you ask him, be sure that your faith is in God alone. Do not waver, for a person with divided loyalty is as unsettled as a wave of the sea that is blown and tossed by the wind.”

Patricia’s heart was to bless her beloved friends with the gift of truth through self-reflection. As they each took one of the contracts from the bowl, the answer to the questions would offer them a window of seeing something within themselves they hadn’t seen before. It would potentially provide wisdom about the blocker that hindered their fellowship with God and kept the blessing of marriage at bay. They received an opportunity to both examine and commit themselves to grow in those areas. Most importantly, the contract opens a dialogue with the person of the Holy Spirit about behaviors and attitudes where they might have been blinded before. It allows him room to lead and guide them to see the truth of what has held them back, and this is a powerful revelation.

As we live and breathe today, 1John 3:2 tells us that we are not the person we will be. Only God knows what we will become. He has a plan, and His plan incorporates provision for the process of our transformation. The operative word is ‘process!’ We are becoming more like Christ with each choice we make to shed old stuff and walk in the newness he brings. As we seek, knock, and ask for wisdom in faith, God provides it, and wisdom builds. It creates a greater space for the blessing we seek. If we continue to be humbled by the correction of God’s Word, and diligent to the task of accepting it, we will signal the heavens that we are prepared for the newness of all that marriage brings.■

Scripture quotations marked (NLT) are taken from the Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Wheaton, Illinois 60189. All rights reserved.

Scripture taken from the New King James Version. Copyright © 1982 by Thomas Nelson, Inc. Used by permission. All rights reserved.

“Patricia’s Christmas Soiree” written by Reverend Fran Mack, edited by Kim Times for Sundie Morning Sistas ©2018. All rights reserved. All done to the glory of God through Jesus Christ, our Lord! SMS is dedicated to inspiring and encouraging Christian Women through the Word of God.