I received a phone call recently from a Christian woman who’s been single for a little while.  Like many of our sisters out there patiently waiting, she’s attractive, savvy, stable and witty.  She’s at a point in her life where she’s expecting God to bless her with a good man any day now.  The only draw-back is that she finds herself being the pursuer instead of being the one being pursued. Not long ago, she was introduced to someone by a friend and they decided to meet up for a bite to eat. They both agreed, “No pressure, just a casual meeting.” She was surprised by how literal he took this.

Come on now, you know how we do. Even though it was casual, sister-girl still had, “First date” on the brain. She got a little dolled up because we all want to leave the best first impression we can. Well, that wasn’t quite the approach he took. As a matter of fact, it didn’t appear as though he had put much effort into making his best impression at all. His appearance left something to be desired and his demeanor was lackluster, but after dinner she still sent him a ‘thank you—nice to meet you’ text later that evening. Days later, nothing—zilch—nada—crickets.  No call, no text, not even to say hello.

She called me and asked if she should be the one to call. My response to her, “Absolutely NOT!” It’s not about playing cat and mouse games. It’s a matter of how we truly see and value ourselves as women. There are people in your life that appreciate you, and you know this because they make you feel appreciated. Just as game recognizes game, light recognizes light. Heavenly Father wouldn’t make a presentation of a marital partner who can’t see our light and appreciate it. He tells us as much in 2Corinthians 6:14 when He says that light and darkness can’t have communion with each other.

There isn’t much talk these days about what it means when a man under no uncertain terms expresses his interest in a woman. In my estimation, it sets the foundation that allows confidence in the union to continue to build. Men and women have equally important roles in a relationship, but Heavenly Father made it clear right from the giddy-up that these roles are different. Both are to nurture a sense of being valued and appreciated by each other. God’s standard is that the man gets the ball rolling on this. If he’s not up to the task at least a little bit, you don’t have much to work with.

Amos 3:3(KJV) poses an interesting question that cuts right down to the meat of the matter. Amos was a prophet who learned what many of us have found challenging to learn in life. He asked in this verse, “Can two walk together, except they be agreed?” There must be agreement for us to walk with God, and there must be agreement for two individuals to walk together as partners. Agreement is consistency, compatibility, conformity, and harmony with one another. You are God’s daughter! You carry His Spirit which is the greatest thing any of us can ever hope to possess. You have to ask yourself if you are in agreement with your own self-worth. If you are, you won’t want to walk with someone who’s not in agreement with it.

There isn’t a man or woman that doesn’t want to feel loved. And one thing about love, it knows how to wait. Love can’t be pushed, shoved or forced. Love is a decision. It’s a choice, and no matter how hard we try, we can’t make someone want to be with us or love us. The person that is right for us will make the choice because God placed something within us long ago that has been destined to draw our partners to us, and us to them. We must be committed to wait on the Lord until this precious agreement happens. It’s worth the wait!

If you have shown appreciation to a man by allowing him to indulge your company, he cannot do less than showing that he appreciates this courtesy. If he’s to be in your life in a significant way, he will be in agreement with the love of Christ you’ve shown, not hesitant about it.

If you accept less, less is what you’ll have. Arrogance has nothing to do with this. It’s a matter of valuing the love of Christ within your own heart. Because, Sis, if your light truly shines, a man worthy of it will see it, and will consider it a treasure from heaven to be able to bask in it. ■

Scripture quotations marked (NLT) are taken from the Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Wheaton, Illinois 60189. All rights reserved.

“Love Knows How to Wait” written by Kim Times, edited by Reverend Fran Mack for Sundie Morning Sistas ©2019.  All rights reserved. All done to the glory of God through Jesus Christ, our Lord! SMS is dedicated to inspiring and encouraging Christian Women through the Word of God.