“Marriage is not for me – I just don’t see myself being with the same person year after year.”  Have you ever heard someone make this statement? I have, and I know folks over 50 that have never been married and still continue to feel this way. “Marriage just isn’t my thing…” is another statement I’ve heard some singles make more than a few times. Don’t get me wrong, I know full well that every person isn’t going to desire marriage, and we don’t need to be married in order to have a beautiful life. But if you don’t plan to ever get married, what’s the plan for physical intimacy? We know that God designed this aspect of marriage to bind a couple together in unity, so there’s an obvious question before many folks who hold the opinion that marriage isn’t for them. Is it fair to impede another person’s destiny or desire for marriage by binding yourself to them intimately?

God’s Word is the definitive authority on all things pertaining to life. If God says it, that is indeed IT! He’s left an indisputable key for us in the commandment He made to His people living in Old Testament times. For generations, God specifically commanded His children not to intermarry with people who worshipped idols or who had rejected His truth. We saw the repercussions of violating God’s commandment in the lives of Naomi’s sons, Mahlon and Chilion, in the Book of Ruth. They died young and left their wives widows, and their mother without a source of support.

Some look at the wisdom of God’s statutes in ridicule. They think to themselves that these standards are not useful to Godly living today. This is a dangerous way to think. Our Heavenly Father’s wisdom is unmatched. None of us can fathom His magnificence and intelligence. He hasn’t changed, nor will He ever change. The precedent He set was unquestionable. He didn’t want His children to take on the energy and be affected by the erroneous beliefs, habits, or cultures of those who would never turn to Him or make Christ the Lord of their lives. In Deuteronomy 23:3-4(NLT), He told them, “3You must not intermarry with them. Do not let your daughters and sons marry their sons and daughters, 4for they will lead your children away from me to worship other gods.”

Some of us bind ourselves to people we have no business bonding with. The best way to prevent this from happening is to ask God whether we are making a mistake before we make it. There’s such a thing as transference. Some refer to it as transmutation, which is engaging in an action that causes your state of being to be altered or changed into something it wasn’t before. Sex does this. Not only is it unfair to mess with someone else’s spiritual journey this way, it’s a sin before God. And tons of people never repent for it.

In Genesis 2:18(NLT), our Heavenly Father said, “It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper who is just right for him.” This is the kind of loving Father our God is. He sees our need, and He wants us to depend on Him to fulfill it. But we have a part to play in this. We should try very hard not to alter someone’s spiritual journey or cause them to sin simply to satisfy our own physical pleasure. We are changed in ways we can’t begin to know when we take on the energy of others through physical intimacy. We should honor God and love ourselves enough to not let someone do this to us, and we should refuse to do it to anyone else. ■

Scripture quotations marked (NLT) are taken from the Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Wheaton, Illinois 60189. All rights reserved.

“Just Right for YOU!” written by Kim Times, edited by Reverend Fran Mack for Sundie Morning Sistas ©2019.  All rights reserved. All done to the glory of God through Jesus Christ, our Lord! SMS is dedicated to inspiring and encouraging Christian Women through the Word of God.