I watched an interview last week of a woman that described her disappointment in getting back into the dating scene. She’s 35 years-old and is really having a challenging time. She wonders if she’ll ever find love again. Her divorce was very painful, and now that she has to raise two young girls, she wants to be sure she’s setting an example of strength. Having a two-parent home is also very important to her. She wants her girls to believe in the institution of marriage and doesn’t want them to develop fear around it. Considering the difficulty she’s encountered with finding someone special, she wonders if she can reassure her daughters that you can have a marriage where both partners are loyal, happy, and fulfilled.
As parents, it is not only loving but responsible of us to consider that our attitudes and behaviors will influence our children in a big way. The Old Testament speaks of generational sins and curses that were passed from generation to generation. This isn’t because God passed them, but because negative thoughts, feelings, and beliefs of the parents were never confronted with the truth of God’s Word. The parents never repented from these things, and therefore continued the poor and wrong behaviors. They modeled them before their children; then their children became parents who then, again, modeled them before the eyes of their children. Sin and negativity were passed down, and the more the sinful patterns continued, the more entrenched they became. We see this with many addictions, dysfunction, and isms in our family cultures and communities.
20/20 Hindsight
Pain and struggle are often calling cards for change. They signal that we need to find our way back to God’s plan for our lives. This is such a good lesson for us. Many people totally ignore the reality that the complexities of life can cause them to get off the path of God’s purpose. The solution to getting back on the path is to remove the blockers that keep us from it. It’s to pursue God’s wisdom and find out what He requires, so we can follow the path that He’s laid before us. This isn’t the path we choose, it’s the path that He, and only He, has chosen for us.
Sometimes we have generational stuff hiding out in our hearts, and we have neither confronted nor repented from them. We have negative patterns, sometimes quite nasty ones, that surface with the significant people in our lives. Divorce and heartbreaks of any kind can provide a lens that will help us reflect on our own behavior. When we’re in a relationship and things are not going well, some of us panic, go into denial, or play the blame game. The end of the relationship will often give us 20/20 hindsight. When we’re in it, we can’t see what we’re doing that may contribute to the relationship’s demise, but once it has ended, some of us see more clearly. We can look at the things we could have done differently. This perspective offers valuable clues, and we must be guided by the Spirit to analyze, heal, and deal with them.
He doesn’t fail
Proverbs 19:21(NLT) tells us, “You can make many plans, but the LORD’s purpose will prevail.” This verse is very simply written and is easy to understand, but the impact of its truth is astounding. It provides the firm foundation on which we can anchor our hopes and dreams. All of us make plans for our futures, but one of the valuable lessons that a broken relationship can teach us is how quickly and dramatically our plans can fall apart. God is the glue that holds everything together, and we must trade our plans for His plans.
God said in Jeremiah 29:11(NLT), “For I know the plans I have for you…They are plans for good and not for disaster, to give you a future and a hope.” God is GOD! He doesn’t need any help from us to set His plan in motion. In Jeremiah 17:8, God says we’re like trees planted by the riverbank, with roots that reach deep down in the water. Such trees are not bothered by the heat of the sun, but drink in its’ nourishment and don’t ever have to worry about a drought. The leaves of this tree remain green continually, and this tree never stops bearing fruit. The other truths reflected in this verse is that God created the tree, as well as the sun and the soil that keep it nourished. Everything about this tree and its’ care is included in God’s perfect plan.
God causes all things to work together according to HIS purposes. He has a plan for our individual lives, and it cannot fail. His plan includes the well-being of our children, our spouses, our care, and every other provision we need. He wants the best for us, and He wants us to be happy, so the best thing we can do for ourselves is surrender our agenda for His agenda. It’s to stop worrying about how our children see our mistakes and make sure they see our commitment to Christ. When we yield to him and allow him to teach us how to be truly led by the Spirit, our lives will be a testament of God’s truth because we will be living and blessed according to His plan.■
Scripture quotations marked (NLT) are taken from the Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Wheaton, Illinois 60189. All rights reserved.
“God’s Plan for Your Life Works” written by Kim Times, edited by Reverend Fran Mack, for Sundie Morning Sistas ©2020. All rights reserved. All done to the glory of God through Jesus Christ, our Lord! SMS is dedicated to inspiring and encouraging Christian Women through the Word of God.