Ecclesiastes 4:9-12(NLT)
“9 Two people are better off than one, for they can help each other succeed. 10 If one person falls, the other can reach out and help. But someone who falls alone is in real trouble. 11 Likewise, two people lying close together can keep each other warm. But how can one be warm alone? 12 A person standing alone can be attacked and defeated, but two can stand back-to-back and conquer. Three are even better, for a triple-braided cord is not easily broken.”

In significant relationships, companionship is extremely important. Companionship is a partnership among two people who share the same interest of connecting and developing a meaningful relationship. It’s a friendship so true that the bond is deep and not easily broken. On its own, this level of companionship in some instances can be so rewarding that many people would choose it over marriage. It’s having someone you can count on, someone that you know has your back. This is what many of us find convenient, because it comes without the stress of looking for something deeper and the disappointment of not finding it.

Nowadays, people choose a nice companionship over marriage because they perceive it as an easier commitment to handle. For many, our modern precepts for companionship leave out marriage altogether. For some men, it becomes a rendition of friendship that includes some of the benefits of marriage but places no demands on exclusivity. So, now, when people say, “this is my companion”, people automatically assume marriage is out and that these two folks have opted to have each other’s back devoid of the kind of closeness a marriage builds. This kind of companionship is one of the ways that we’ve drummed up to avoid problems of heartache and loneliness. If this is our choice, we must be very careful not to displease God with it.

We must be clear that when God set the boundaries of companionship, it was within the confines of marriage. Within their marital union, Adam and Eve were companions in every way. There can be no doubt in our minds that God ordained marriage to be the sleeve that surrounded the companionship between a man and woman. This is what God sanctioned, and to keep a companionship pleasing to Him, Ecclesiastes 4:9-12 presents some very important guideposts we need to follow.

Two people are better off than one

If you can have someone who truly cares about your well-being and there is a mutual trust and admiration for one another, you have found a gem. An arm around your shoulders in tough times, holding hands, and good conversations that leave you feeling fulfilled and understood can go a long way. To protect this connection, you must keep it holy and uncompromised by physical intimacy.

For they can help each other succeed

As we mature in years, life can become more challenging. Having a companion by your side when you are tackling these challenges increases your confidence. This can lead to your success over obstacles. We don’t have all the answers, and a wise sounding board can make a huge difference in our decision making. This kind of trust and loyalty is built over time, and both the man and woman must be committed to help each other with no ulterior motives in mind.

If one person falls, the other can reach out and help

To fall down and have the strength and agility to get back up can be hard. Many of us lean on a trusted companion. Often, they are the ones that God sends to help us get back on our feet. They can be a shoulder to cry on and be a blessing to our healing process. We should never neglect to demonstrate our gratitude to God for placing this person in our lives. We should also demonstrate our gratitude to this man, but we should never take steps to make the companionship more than what God ordained it to be.

A person standing alone can be attacked and defeated, but two can stand back-to-back and conquer 

A companion that has your back is truly a blessing from God. You will see the Father working through them to be a blessing to you many times. This is what He does, He works through people to help us, and we are often surprised at the level they will go to in order to be in our corner. When you find a man like this, don’t ruin it by stepping over the lines God has established. Protect this blessing with the spiritual maturity of self-control.

Sinful behavior is left out of the equation

Many companionships will not lead to marriage. They are with men that are sent to be a blessing to your life, and you to theirs. Never jump the gun. Don’t automatically assume this man is ordained to be your husband. Until God tells you that you’re in the company of your future spouse, keep your companions as the very best of friends. Keep those boundaries intact, understanding that the spiritual maturity you demonstrate in companionship is the discipline that equips you for what comes next.■

Scripture quotations marked (NLT) are taken from the Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Wheaton, Illinois 60189. All rights reserved.

“A Strong Companionship”, written by Kim Times, edited by Fran Mack for Sundie Morning Sistas ©2022. All rights reserved. All done to the glory of God through Jesus Christ, our Lord!